curious, the tasks
you can complete with these tools:
gouda, gold, and logs
Additional Comments:
To reflect on a myriad of Herculean tasks, first I must reflect on that of which I've stubbornly opposed for so many years. That which would prove to be my portal to a number of games I salivated over as I watched various Let's Plays or general reviews on YouTube, yet remained as games that would stay out of my reach as long as I stood my ground on the premise of spite and pure bullheadedness for my loathing of digital downloads, DRM, and a vast assortment of bullshit that has unfortunately become the norm in the realm of gaming these days. It's time to admit my long enduring personal battle is for naught; that times have changed, and I can either get with the program or resort solely to nightly YouTube viewings as my only means to experience some of these gaming wonders. Crap. You win, Steam.
Most people, nay, everyone would likely call me an idiot for purposefully giving Steam the cold shoulder for so many years. That's fine. Frankly, I don't care. But I also don't care for the idea of leasing; be it games, music, books, whatever. I've long been an opponent of everything existing in the digital realm, plain and simple. However, slowly accepting the inevitable, the Wii, Wii U, Xbox 360, and Xbox One have helped guide me towards this abomination to material goods. Ok, maybe Steam has suddenly opened up a truly impressive library of games for me, and that's fantastic, but I still despise the medium with all the hatred my black, twisted, little heart can muster.
Eh, if I'm still so livid over the whole concept, why'd I finally concede? Two reasons. The first is a marvelous little city builder called City: Skylines. This game blew my mind when I chanced across it on YouTube. Immediately, I sought it out and fell downtrodden after learning that you could only get it via Steam (although days later I learned it would be coming to Xbox One in 2016). Still, this was the first game I had come across that put enough of a fire in my belly to finally stand down and accept all the wonderful bliss that Steam has to offer, even if it goads my principles with its digital BS. The second reason, which coincidentally occurred just a few short days after discovering Cities: Skylines, I came to possess a free Steam gift card. It's as if a shining beacon lay before me, cajoling me with all the tools necessary to venture forth. Yet at the same time, it simply said to quit my bitching and accept this window into a wonderful realm of gaming. Fuck it.
So how do I find myself here? The game was ninety-something cents, and quickly viewing a clip over on YouTube proved convincing enough that the game's well worth the tiny price...I hope. The 12 Labours of Hercules is a simple time management game that plays either as a casual time waster or as a brutal test in multitasking depending on the mode. To be honest, I've never played a time management game, at least that I'm aware of as I assume they all more or less play out exactly the same. Had the genre been described to me in full detail beforehand, I'd likely pass on the game. It sounds boring, and in many respects, it is. However, a funny thing happened. I found myself completely wrapped up in the game within just a few short levels. I'm not sure why as there is very little to the game. It's equivalent to a mobile game, which isn't surprising since it eventually found its way onto iOS and Android devices. Essentially, it's something to pass the time.
There's something to be said for games that act as tools to pass the time though. There's obviously some element of enjoyment stuffed in there, otherwise even boredom itself would prove gangbusters in the face of this stuff. Perhaps they're simple at their core, but often enough, simplicity can prove to be a wonderful direction in gaming. A number of my favorite games rely on some of the most rudimentary mechanics. VVVVVV and Katamari Damacy are two prime examples. At the heart of it all, there's really nothing to either of those games, yet what the developers manage to concoct with such an elementary premise is nothing short of magnificent. In a way, 12 Labours of Hercules is in a very similar boat. I wouldn't call the game magnificent, but it is a joy to play, and kept my attention long enough to try and get three gold stars on every single level in Expert mode. Hell, it convinced me to download the sequel, and unless the developer just completely missed the mark, I foresee the third title to follow suit. Very few games make me want to rush into the sequels, and I believe it takes a special amount of wonder, joy, and excitement to manage such a feat. Surprisingly, 12 Labours of Hercules did just that.
I have to admit, the game screams of mobile relations. The overly lavish yet lighthearted cartoon graphics had me on the fence. I typically shy away from games dressed up in this particular graphical style - a style that feels too contemporary, but not exactly cutting edge. It's a style that feels like a safe middle ground used specifically to attract the casual crowd. Usually, I consider that a red flag; at least in regards to those games I have a genuine interest in. But then, as I amble tenderly through my workload clearing debris, collecting cheese, and chopping down trees, I find the graphics to be the perfect choice. The game is so happy-go-lucky at heart, so it's only appropriate to present it as such. Otherwise, how else would we still find Hercules endearing despite wasting his days sleeping in a hammock while a subdued Cerberus, Medusa, Pegasus, and a bevy of slaves do all the dirty work. I'm sorry, servants, but we know what they really are. Or dare we suggest such a lighthearted game depict an eromenos (i.e. boy lover)? How foul of me to suggest such a thing. Servant it is then. Nevertheless, it's ok, great hero. We'll call for you when we need a giant boulder lifted, or.... What the hell else did that lazy bastard do? But we can't truly be mad at Hercules. Look how adorable he looks catching Zs, perhaps dreaming about how he's been miraculously sucked into a twisted time flux where he's somehow performing his dozen famous labors before the need ever arose out of penance for Megara's murder at his hands.
Wait. If Megara's still alive, then... What the hell is going on here? Who am I kidding? With such a playful tone running rampant throughout the game, should I have ever expected the game to be faithful to the events as commonly told in Greek Mythology? That would be equivalent to accepting any number of Disney movies as canon. Sure, the wondrous retelling of Pocahontas is entirely authentic in that made for family, Disney sort of way. As is the case here. There's no need to be gruesome and demoralizing. Megara was simply kidnapped.
In truth, I'm only snide and sarcastic because I can be. There's no real need to pick apart the story, or poke holes in the obvious mythological faux pas. But at the same time, the casual nature and retelling of Hercules' mighty deeds is ripe for ridicule only because there's nothing else to complain about. The sum components come together to make a brilliant game that proves highly addictive. And what I found to be the icing on the cake is the difficulty. Whether you play on Casual or Expert, the difficulty grade is perfect. Casual is clearly manageable but still tight enough on time to at least keep a relative sense of impetus whereas Expert really piles on the anxiety as you constantly eye the timer trying to best lay your strategy along the deteriorating Greek roads. Run, you stupid fools, run! For such a simple game, the tension is real, yet incredibly exhilarating.
Expert mode especially grabbed me because that's where the game comes into its own. The amount of laborious permutations is enough to make your head spin and the final world can really rattle your nerves as you try and figure out the best course of action. Several levels griefed the hell out of me as I worked toward the triple stars. Questioning and constantly second-guessing the workload proved to be a test in insanity as I often found myself repeating the same pattern yet for some reason, expecting different results. It's as if I wanted to prove the game wrong. I just know the workshop and farm need to be built before the store. My stubbornness got the best of me and I found myself repeating levels far too many times. Like an idiot, I somehow believed Expert could be played similarly to Casual as far as strategy was concerned. At least I realized the importance of the Horn of Plenty, though I still jumped at the opportunity for a bonus worker even when it was clear as day that a bonus worker was the worst possible option to strive for. Ah well. Through our mistakes we learn. Even if we make a few dozen of the same exact mistakes. Eventually...we'll learn.
Another element that added just enough variety to the game was the final stage, known as mini-games, in each area. Essentially they take the role of bosses. They're not exactly difficult. If anything, the levels themselves are far more difficult than the mini-games, but then, I don't think that's the point. Carrying the appellation of mini-game should be clue enough that they're simply a device to break the trend of time management throughout the rest of the game. Now, they're not great, at least compared to the core mechanics elsewhere, but they're appreciated. The healing of Chiron may be my personal favorite only because it broke the mold from simply power clicking the mouse button over the boss by adding a pharmaceutical scavenger hunt.
Finally, 12 Labours of Hercules continued its trend of salivating addiction with its music. Much like the game itself, there's really nothing special there, yet I found it oddly satisfactory; fitting even. The music never exactly insisted upon itself as exemplary aural candy attempting to draw attention away from the task at hand, but played the part of background enjoyment to a T. Tunes like BGM2 or BGM3 demonstrate exactly that.
Unfortunately, 12 Labours of Hercules is a game that I don't think I can recommend, in good conscience, at least to everyday gamers, only because it plays as a guilty pleasure. To fans of the genre, I totally recommend the game, otherwise I feel as though I should wash my hands of the game, like Hello Kitty: Happy Party Pals or the two Pokémon Pinball titles. But I think that's the tragedy of casual games in general. Even the best of the best are hard to pass along only because few sensible gamers would ever wish to admit enjoying such endeavors. So, in hopes to avert such tragedy in the name of brilliant gaming, I hereby decree 12 Labours of Hercules a fantastic gem of a game that, if anything, proved to me that Steam was totally worth the hit to personal principle, and I have to applaud it for that alone.
Rating: 3.5 lazy, pederastic heroes out of 5
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