PS2 - Katamari Damacy

Haiku-Review:

I feel the cosmos -
touched by a constellation?
like that's possible

Additional Comments:

Where do I even begin? Katamari Damacy is undeniably worlds apart from anything that has come before it...or since for that matter. From the moment you lay eyes on the beautiful cover artwork depicting a pair of cows standing beneath a rainbow as a giant Katamari shouldering a stadium, Ferris wheel, sperm whale, some sort of ginormous psychedelic mushroom, and other loony devices looms in the distance, the quirky mystique that is Katamari Damacy immediately sets in, only to blossom once the disc is put into action. The colors, the characters, the story, the gameplay, the world - it's all so very...bizarre. But bizarre isn't exactly the term I'm looking for. There's more than enough weirdness going on out there in the world of video games, but there's something about Katamari Damacy that raises it to a whole new level of awe.

First off, I find Katamari Damacy a very difficult game to explain to people. It's one of those games, that despite its totally addictive tenure of brilliance and fun, there's just no way to express that thrill of play into words, especially when the gameplay is nothing more than rolling a ball, er...Katamari around and collecting everyday objects. Honestly, that sounds boring as hell no matter how hard you try to sell it. Collection games as a whole can be pretty trite in the fun department and it takes something truly special to make such a game stand out and survive more than a few short hours of gameplay, or heck even ten minutes of trial play. For me, collection games usually lose their charm fairly quick. A simple comparison can be made to a lot of the turn-based rpg's - they grow stale over time. But Katamari Damacy never befell that perilous rut; no matter how many times I had to run through Make the Moon just to pick up a couple of advertisements or Make Taurus to try and finally pick off the Holy Cow - how much I hated trying to bounce down into Seagull Park perfectly without either bouncing out or hitting one of those damn Cow-Men.

Explanation aside, even showcasing the game somehow leaves little to the imagination. Big deal! You roll a ball of glue around and snatch up everything in the world. I'll admit that when I first saw footage of the game, while it piqued my interest, I had my reservations. What sold me was everything that went along with it: the King of All Cosmos and his arrogant attitude, the nutty cutscenes about a couple of block-headed kids who appear to retain a certain intimacy with the heavens, and that oh so wonderful soundtrack. Are you kidding me!? The soundtrack is pure win!!! (But I'll get to that later...)

Once you get your hands on it though, it's something else entirely. The intro itself, for a lack of better words, is fucking orgasmic. Honestly, I've found that the best way to describe this game to anyone left in the dark, or perhaps the old naysayers, is to simply show them the intro. I somehow feel like I'm being subjected to an awkward Japanese reinterpretation of Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band. What the fuck is going on - or am I just stoned out of my mind!?

But seriously, the introduction is a genuine hook. And once you get into the game you just can't put it down. Unfortunately, the game is short and easy. But that's only a problem if you're just out to beat the game and move on in your tirade of video game conquests. However, if you wish to collect every object, every cousin, every named object, every gift - and heck, every country, it can take some time, especially, as I said, trying to track down some of those advertisements. Normally, I'd find this to be a fault in collection based games as a cheap way to elongate the playing time, but here it works and could almost be referenced as a godsend. Unlike most collection games, at least in my experience, Katamari Damacy forces you to look at each level in a sort of outside-the-box fashion as you try and track down the remaining objects needed to fill out your lists. This is because relative size versus world size can become an issue under certain circumstances. You have to be aware of when you need to pack some girth and where you need to be within a certain size limit. Sure, you can play the game blindly; rolling around collecting haphazardly, or you can play with some strategy as you try and tackle specific objects when necessary. Mostly, it's just fun to knock everyone about as you clumsily build your Katamari even while you're trying to buckle down and make goal.

Then you have your storylines. Between each level are some of the oddest cutscenes I've ever come across in a video game. First, there's the pompous King of all Cosmos. Whether he's carelessly throwing Royal Presents away, constantly chiding the Prince for his overall puny stature and general ineptness, or continually boasting his own efforts despite never lifting a finger except to inexplicably destroy the heavens, I have to say that the King of All Cosmos is a complete and total ass. Yet, he's strangely engaging and charismatic - like that's possible. Somehow I feel drawn to his words and find him a trusting lord of the skies.

Stacked on top of the Royal Family's dilemma is a secondary story following the Hoshino family. What a weird boat this lot is. I think I got an even bigger kick out of these scenes than I did with the Royal Family's. As the haiku says, "I feel it. I feel the cosmos," will stick with me for far too long. There's something wholly disturbing about hearing Michiru repeat this line time and time again. Maybe I'm just not in tune with the universe like she is. Sigh.

What really makes this game pop more than anything though has undoubtedly got to be the soundtrack. I don't think there's a single weak link in the chain. Every song is a total earworm; not the type you'd willingly suffer tinnitus to detract yourself from, but a series of catchy melodies that drive you to question how you ever got along without them. Seriously, the opening theme, Nana-Nan Katamari, has been stuck in my head for weeks now and I catch myself humming it all the time. No complaints here. Of course, there's incredible tracks like Katamari on the Rocks, Overture, Lonely Rolling Star, or Que Sera, Sera, but my absolute favorite(s) has to be Lovely Angel and its reconstructed form: Flavored Angel Gift. Given my soft spot for those beautifully wet synth sounds, I could listen to an endless loop of Lovely Angel for hours on end.

In the end, the game is completely out of this world, yes, but it is one of the best games I've gotten my hands on to date. It's very rare for a game to impress me so much that I want to jump immediately into its sequel. Well, Katamari Damacy managed just that. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to add We Love Katamari into my collection as of yet. A downer for sure, but I suspect I'll scratch the indelible itch soon enough.

Nano-Win:

Namco is right - the first tissue in a newly opened box of tissues is always two! What's up with that!?

Rating: 5 Smelly Cat's out of 5

SFC - VIP and Wall Mix 1: ASCII Art Edition

Haiku-Review:

oh, smiling Boon,
why do these cats hate you so?
translation I need

Additional Comments:

Well, now I feel guilty giving 2ch's SMW hack collaboration origin a haiku, but neglected to pen one for SMWC's initial foray into collab hacks. I probably wouldn't feel so gutted (I'm not) if I hadn't written such a blatantly nonchalant review, especially when a majority of my thoughts were posted elsewhere. Seems I really snubbed that game and rather undeservedly at that - well, I don't know if undeservedly is the choicest word since there are quite a few problems. Then again, the wisest way to describe that game: an experiment, much like the first VIP and Wall Mix. Aha! Cleverly utilized segue.

Like any hack, no matter the foundation and/or purpose, it's guaranteed that the game is going to play incredibly unpolished. Hey, it's a hack, what do you expect? We're not talking about professional grade games made by professional, nine-to-five game makers. Ok, maybe there are a few rare selections that can sneak their way over to the grown-up table, but Mix 1 is certainly not one of them. If anything, Mix 1 is about the furthest thing from a well-rounded, professional-aspiring 2D romp. Ok, all the YouTube spew out there is far worse, but that goes without saying. Lest we forget, Mix 1 was developed in the early days of SMW hacking when tools were few and those tools that did exist were extremely limited in functionality. And I think that is often overlooked when people are quick to eschew the early SMW hacks. Unfortunately, the vast majority of gamers are so reliant on bells and whistles, namely graphics, that they will quickly sneer at anything that appears to have backpedaled. What mystifies me is the amount of people who dip their toe into ROM hacking and express the same attitudes. I'll never understand this, but then I suppose I'm putting too much faith in the intelligence of the gaming masses. The point is, for someone to rail Mix 1 purely on aesthetics is absurd. Sure, the VIP contributors could have spent a little more time buffing out the details - Trap! Riddle? Joke Material! immediately comes to mind - but as long as the functionality is there and there's no guesswork involved, I'm not going to complain. I'll admit that I don't like looking at blocky, cutoff ugliness myself, but I think there's also a time and place to place blame on beauty over architecture. Mix 1, and really all the Mix's, it's obvious that the hacks place importance on level design and not razzle-dazzle. Otherwise, fire away, and I'd jump aboard the bandwagon myself and harp on the ugliness that is VIP and Wall.

What should be criticized is level design, difficulty and the wanton abuse of tricks, glitches and any other aggravating programming anomalies that are taken advantage of. But even here I feel some leniency can be allowed. The question is how much, though you may be asking why I'm even willing to look the other way when it comes to the grief of advanced flight control, for instance. Well, honestly, it's a hack. I know that's a cop-out, but the reality is that we're dealing with an entirely different beast here. It again showcases that we're dealing with hobbyists and not paid developers. And while I can only speak for my own personal interests, my belief is that a majority of these hobbyists are doing it purely for their own gratifications. They're not out to make a buck; nor do they have any real ambition of attaining quality or perfection outside of their own acquired taste. Collaborations likely being the one exception to the rule, but even here, quality is more or less standardized to the ambitions of the collab leaders and not the paying public. Of course, a vast number of published games out on the market, ranging from the beginnings of the industry to today could likely render the argument moot, but that's another story.

Much to the dismay of many, the VIP's thrive on difficulty and questionably unfair tactics. But unlike many hacks, or even games that do the same, the VIP's manage to exude fun no matter how diabolical the levels become - primary examples being (^O^) Smooooth, Boon's Mechanism Mansion, or MissingNo. All three of these levels aggravated the hell out of me, yet I still thoroughly enjoyed them. (^O^) Smooooth's secret exit's reliance on uncanny flight maneuverability is way over the top, but at the same time, it's not exactly brutal, say to the point of Kaizo's madness, or perhaps something more dear to most gamer's out there: Battletoad's Turbo Tunnel, or for those who ever made it that far: Rat Race. For me, it almost comes across as a training ground for advanced tips and tricks - which does have it's use later on in the game or series.

However, there is a dramatic drawback to glitch/trick reliance. Obviously, the average gamer is not going to know how to perform any of Mario's demanding Cirque du Soleil-like talents. Never mind advanced aptitudes, the average gamer complains about the increased emphasis on Mario's little used spin jump in most hacks. Figuring there was only one place in the original Super Mario World (that I can quickly think of off the top of my head) where the spin jump was mandatory - Star World 1 - why would anyone willingly use it? On the surface, it was a weaker jump. Point is, that is a major issue with this game. If you don't know the ins and outs of SMW trickery, you're going to be fully stumped by the time you reach the end of the first world; possibly sooner if you're looking to score the secret exits. And what fun is that? No fun. While I can't say I sympathize with the less than adept, I can fully understand the grief the game causes and the chastising that results. I'm sure I would completely hate the game if I fell into the same category of gamers. Graces to Super Kaizo World for planting the seed to enhance my Mario abilities I suppose and/or curses to the game for the exact same. Not sure what I feel more, especially since I now look at Super Mario World or any of its plagiarized derivatives in a different light.

Basically, the overall fairness and difficulty of the game is idiotic and it's about as beautiful as an open blood wound, but the levels are experimental, clever, and strangely a joy to play. I know most people would avidly disagree with my opinion on architecture and fun, but I'm certain there's a ripe handful of gamers out there who wouldn't. And while it's not the best in the VIP series, I somehow keep returning to the one that started it all. I don't know how many times I've completed this game, but I do know that I still get as much enjoyment out of it now as I did the first time I played it. Somehow, I just can't say the same for the subsequent VIP's - though it could simply be a case of nostalgia. Meh...

Nano-Rant:

There's one room in Boon's Mechanism Mansion where I still have no idea what the intended solution is. Every time I've been thrown into the room, I've always had to manipulate the P-Balloon and ON/OFF triggers differently than intended and perform either a shell jump or P-Switch jump. If anything, it's given me more confidence in real-time shell jumping techniques. Huzzah!!

Rating: 3.5 apples out of 5